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Group for members who are on dialysis, or living with kidney disease, and are not candidates for kidney transplants.
Latest Activity: Mar 20
Started by Aquinob Jul 28, 2014.
I have been on dialysis for 11 years now! I can't get a transplant but doing nocturnal dialysis 6 to 8 hours every other day has helped me tremendously. This is the way to go.
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This is my 3rd try at answering. I keep closing my browser and losing it. I'm sorry your mom was so ill. MRSA seems to be a horrible affliction. She did very well to hang on as long as she did. I haven't had a pleasant life. I won't go into it but living for almost 64 years with nothing good to look back on and nothing to look forward to doesn't give me much incentive to go on.
My husband died 18 months ago. He was an alcoholic and died from cirrhosis. He lived for 6 weeks after I put him in hospital but he'd done so much damage to his brain that he didn't know where he was or who I was most of the time. He was sedated and even though it was 6 weeks it seemed that he had a very peaceful end. My daughter and I were with him when he passed.
I've always been independent and it's such a habit that I feel silly asking for the help I need. My 35yo son is autistic but because he was diagnosed at 15 he was too old to receive services and it's something I've fought for all my life. I'm tired now. I know I've made mistakes with him but it's now at a point that I said I wanted to hire a house cleaner. Then he had a fit cause he doesn't like strangers in the house. I wanted to put hardwood floors down, same thing. I got angry at him and now he's been depressed for 2 weeks which makes life even harder.
My 38yo daughter lives with me too cause she left her husband last year (no kids thankfully). She said I have to stop looking at things negatively. I'm not sick, no one has told me I need to be on dialysis but I feel that I need to be prepared for it. I've heard PD is more effective than hemo plus the hospital is over 1/2hour from here. But if I can't have a clean home and a sterile room like I've read about I can't do home dialysis.
I tried to commit suicide a number of years ago but stopped myself because I was afraid I'd end up brain damaged. I also had a religious upbringing and still have this feeling that suicide is a sin although now I'm not even sure there is a God or whatever. I can see that the things I've been through have made me strong but I really thought I was reaching a point where life would be good now and I get hit with this. That's why I don't want to even start dialysis but I also have seen how upset my daughter was losing her dad, my son doesn't care. They didn't talk for the last 3 years of his life. I know both of them would be upset if they lost me.
I have a question for Stacey. Why did your mother stop dialysis? I ask because I'm a few months shy of 64 and I'm just tired of living this way. I haven't even started dialysis (I'm at 17% GFR) but am looking at options. I don't WANT a transplant. My dad died from PKD at age 55. My neph said I've done well to reach 63. I'm a widow. Even doing PD seems daunting to me.
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